Big Damn Heroes

Big Damn Heroes
Firefly is the king of kickass space adventures.

Thursday, April 14, 2011

A Girl's Dead - Part 1

I looked around, comforted by the fact I wasn't the only one who couldn't pay attention to Mr. Harlman's lecture about the American Revolution. Almost everyone in class was looking anywhere except Mr. Harlman, doodling in notebooks, staring out the window, texting, or reading another book inside their history book. Standard slacking. It really wasn't Harlman's fault, he just decided to give a fairly dull lecture the night after the History channel covered the same stuff he was, except History channel's version was so much cooler.

After staring for a little too long at Chase, I turned back towards her drawing, I really didn't know what she was trying to draw. So far it looked like a sidewalk with something lying on it. I was mostly focusing on shading first, always did.

'...color were the American soldier's uniform and why, Miss Annalise?" I could hear the smirk Mr. Harlman was wearing. But...

"They were blue, well the ones that had uniforms. They dyed them blue since indigo was one of the primary plants grown in the South and it was one of the only colors America had." I replied, trying very hard to keep my own smirk better hidden.

Mr. Harlman gave me a sigh, grudgingly accepted I was perfectly right, then continued the class. Afterwards, out in the hall, I ran smack into Chase. Apparently it was a good day for my luck.

"Oh man, Chase, I am so sorry I didn-" Okay maybe not such a good day, not with all that stuttering.

"Annalise, hey, it's okay. No harm done." Chase bent down and handed me back my bag. "Hey, nice way to show Harlman. Oh, did you hear about Kate's party?"

"Yeah, I did. How come?" I shifted a bit nervously and brushed my hair out of my eyes.

"Just wondering if you were coming, Kate's parties could use someone with some wit."

I laughed, "Yeah, probably. But I'm not big on all the booze at them." There, I said it. I'm not a drinker, I hate alcohol.

"Yeah, well, this one is actually non-alcoholic. She got busted by her parents. Lucky for her, her parents are very relaxed. Just she can't have booze at the parties, she can have them other than that." Chase smirked at me, made me think he was actually interested in more than just Kate's party not having enough wit.

"Well, I guess I'll have to check with Kate then." I replied with my own little smirk. "I have to go, class, y'know, the next one we both have in 4 minutes."

"Well, want company for that long dark walk to boredom of the social studies kind?" Maybe I was lucky, this dark haired guy and this dark haired girl walked to class together. Maybe I'm finally getting some good luck.

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Holy crap! I'm posting! Holy crap! A new short story! Holy crap! I have no idea where this is going. Yay random highschool romance thing? Also first person is completely new for me. Experimentation!

Friday, April 8, 2011

Of Words and Wings

Hey, it's Schatz, just y'know...here. Flailing. But I was thinking...far too many things. Either way, here is an "excerpt" from a new story I'm entertaining. It's more than a bit unpolished, but hey, this is a blog, so suck it. Or something like that.

     Ask stilled his breathing. He could feel the Sieska moving into Omnathkulous's senses and it would not do for the Sieska to feel his breath and give up the whole ambush. Crouched in his dark alley, Ask had only a very narrow field of vision directly in front of him, so he had to rely on Omnath being able to sense and see their quarry. More often than not having your closest friend being a dragon was a plus.

   "Three heartgrips then strike, Etched Question." Omnath's thoughts sprung into Ask's mind. Following his instructions Ask prepared a rawbite, it took exactly three heartbeats to prepare if you were as skilled as he was, and then let it fly as soon as it was ready. As the rawgrip flew from his hands along with something akin to a garbled oath sprung from his lips, a moment of panic bloomed into Ask's mind, then subsided as the Sieska walked directly into the spell's path. Omnathkulous's timing was never wrong.

   Sieskas were extremely adept shapeshifters, very resistant to magic, cautious, and habitual. They also have the nasty habit of stealing reason from minds and being assassins and being completely unable to defend themselves against Hakoubliz spells, which rawbite happened to belong to. As such, the seething mass of energy slammed into this particular assassin, eliciting a horrible little shriek, and killing it instantly. Ask's task was done, his debt was payed, and now he just had to escape the city without anyone seeing that he had just murdered what looked like an upstanding citizen and then travel across half the country to use the favor he had just payed for.

 "You have such an uncomplicated life, Etched Question, it is a wonder you're ever stressed."

Thursday, April 7, 2011

The Inspiring Tale of Deidric Alabaster

Hey, it's Schatz, just y'know...here. Flailing. But I was thinking...Well I was thinking it's time to air out some of my older stuff that I had written, see if I couldn't refine them, get them working again, maybe finally grind a few chapters out of a book or something. Y'know, pretend I can actually write or something. Either way here is a (really) short story I wrote a while back, one of those dark comedy things. You might laugh, then feel bad for laughing, then hopefully laugh again. Either way, please enjoy.
(Does anyone ever have really paranoid moments about copyrighting?)


               There once lived a young boy with a dream, this dream of his was powerful, gripping, and completely engulfed his waking thoughts. This boy wanted to become a comedian. He wanted to become someone who would go and stand upon a stage and make people laugh until they starting to tear up and their sides hurt. Everyone always told tell Deidric he couldn't become a comedian every time he shared his dream with them. But young Deidric refused to relent on his dream, and so he bought all the comedy movies he could, and he watched all the funniest things on Comedy Central, he studied joke books like the bible, and would spend hours writing material.

                Deidric refined his entrances, his exits, his poses, and his smiles. He ensured that he could walk backwards across any stage without tripping and he could spin around and strike a pose at the drop of a hat. This young boy worked night and day to achieve his dream, never allowing the words of his friends, of his teachers, or of his family to discourage him. His comedic material was so well refined, and so funny that you could read just the beginnings of one of his acts and start to laugh uncontrollably. Young Deidric had come so close to achieving his dream of being a comedian that he could just taste it.

                Then one day, Mr. & Mrs. Alabaster came into Deidric's room and sat him down. They then proceeded to explain that he could never be a standup comedian, and he could never be a comedic actor, or any type of comedian. They said that his dream was impossible to achieve. So, he picked up his scripts and gave them to his parents to read, and after they were done laughing and managed to compose themselves they gave him a level look and said, "Dear....you can never become a comedian...because you're mute."

When We Were Stupid...er

Have you ever looked back on something you used to love when you were a kid, then a few years later realized it was absolutely retarded? That's the realization I came to today when I tried to watch an episode of a show I loved when I was about 12 or 13, it was one of those import animes by 4kids (so obviously it had been horribly violated to make it "kid friendly") that played on Saturday mornings. The name of this formerly beloved anime? Shaman King. Yeah, I used to like that. I admit it, I probably didn't have good taste as a child, but I used to love Dragonball Z too.

Either way it was extremely infuriating when I was sitting around trying to watch Shaman King on YouTube (Is there anything [not-porn] you can't find on youtube?) and it just didn't measure up to the awesome ghost-dueling-something-furyukan-something-something-bright-lights-means-you're-really-tough show that I had watched back then. I thought it had to be a fluke, some sort of bad decision you have when you're young, like how I used to enjoy Dashboard Confessional, until I tried watching that old Avengers show that started in the late ninties. Anyone remember that one? The one with Ant-Man? Yeah. Turns out it was horrible. I still have the Ant-Man action figure from that show, and now I'm just...ashamed.

Is anything else like this that I'm missing? Am I still in love with old nerdy loves that are retarded and horrible, but I'm still convinced they're awesome?